"Dear sports media world,
I have never dated Josh Beckett nor was he ever an “ex-flame”. Please fact check. You are journalists, not bloggers.
First of all I was amazed that there was a professional sportsman in America that Alyssa hadn’t taken under her wing,and then I was deeply hurt at this seeming insult to the blogging community.The "Queen of the Blogosphere" (Official Title) calling in to question the standards of we bloggers ? Surely the Universe would fold in on itself given the sheer logical impossibility of such a scenario?
I therefore feel that it is my duty to defend the blogging community against such slurs.Let me give an example of the kind of research and dedication that goes into what we write here; my previous post elicited,quite surprisingly, a quite lively debate on the topic of female genitalia, and, (for the benefit of my readers) I undertook to research this subject thoroughly using all the the power of the internet.Why, there were even some sites that required my credit card details, but I was not prepared to let a few dollars stand between me and the truth (actually some of the sites had a very good deal in which the first 14 days are free before all your financial details are handed over to the Russian mafia).
Of course I attempted to contact Alyssa to put my point of view, but unfortunately could only speak with her lawyer who advised me in no uncertain terms that the restraining order was still in place, and that if I made any more calls he would invoke the extradition treaty that exists between the USA and Great Britain.
As I replaced the receiver, marveling at the complex and exquisite beauty that is the human mating ritual a thought occurred to me.Alyssa was not criticizing we bloggers! She was praising us! Not for us stale facts and mere statistics.We are in fact poets and modern day sooth sayers speaking the truth through complex imagery and modes of expression that a mere journalist cannot hope to comprehend.Once again Miss Milano has proved herself to be ahead of the pack when it comes to seeing the world as it really is.
Either that or we are the victims of the greatest vanity publishing scam in the history of the written word.