There is a program currently being shown on British TV called "Last Man Standing". It basically features a group of young English guys traveling to the remoter parts of the world and competing against the locals in their own sports. So far they have indulged in such ESPN2 type pursuits as "Zulu Stick Fighting" and "Mexican Endurance Running". This week however it was the turn of "Trobriand Cricket" and it may have provided me with the perfect plan to take the Diamondbacks to the World Series.
The Trobriand Islanders have adapted the game of cricket (which was obviously taught to them through the British Empire’s educational program) to the extent that it is now a method of both resolving disputes and a substitute for war. The highlight of the game occurs when a player hits a shot that is caught. He is immediately surrounded by the opposition who begin to wave their arms in the air and chant "The octopus is very sticky! The ball sticks in my hand! In my hand!".
Imagine the upcoming series against the Dodgers. It’s the bottom of the third. The Dodgers have two men on and Jeff Kent is batting. He flies out to Chris Young in center.During his walk to the dug out he is surrounded by all the Diamondbacks players who chide him with the "octopus is very sticky" chant. I’m guessing he would strike out in his next at bat.
I know for a fact that Eric Byrnes would be up for this slice of mild gamesmanship, now if we can just convince the other players and the front office the D-Backs could be unstoppable.
Russell versus the Universe:Update
I am now 3 for 3 in my ongoing, and quite frankly, incredibly confusing duel with the powers of the universe. I am therefore predicting the Dodgers to take 2 of the 3 games in the upcoming series.